Letting Kids Be Kids: Promoting Normalcy in Foster Care

Juvenile Law Center,

Photo via Jefferson Martina on Flickr

Note: This post is part of a series of posts recognizing National Foster Care Month. 

Youth are in foster care often talk about feeling different from their peers. They feel they do not get to take part in the activities and opportunities that most teenagers take for granted. Things like going to a friend's house, a school trip, taking an after-school job, or participating in an extracurricular activity can be beyond a youth's reach. This is because of rules that exist in the foster care system, or, more commonly, misunderstandings about what is legally prohibited and what is not. The result is that many youth in care not only feel different and separate from their peers—they also miss out on crucial opportunities to enjoy activities and to build skills and relationships.

All youth, including youth in foster care, want to be treated like "normal" teenagers. While there isn't one version of "normal," we know the range of experiences that we want most teens to have. These include things like an opportunity to spend time with friends, participate in activities and school, go on school trips and school events, learn to drive, have an after-school job, and take on household chores.

Providing teens with "normal" experiences is about giving them age-appropriate freedom and responsibility. Most youth need to practice the skills they need for adulthood to truly master them. Foster youth—like all children—also deserve opportunities to participate in community and school activities that they enjoy. These activities help them express their creativity and talents, and help them develop supportive and healthy relationships. As the Florida Foster Youth Bill of Rights states, all youth should have the right "to enjoy the milestones of maturity such as driving, school sports and clubs, time with friends, managing personal finances, getting a job, social networking and becoming an independent and contributing member of society." 

While the child welfare system works hard to reduce the time youth spend in foster care, it is crucial to remember the importance of improving the services and opportunities that youth while they are in care. This is especially true for those who are reaching adulthood. Letting kids be kids is something the system can and must do if youth are to transition to adulthood successfully.


Actions You Can Take:

If you are a foster parent or group home provider: Use Youth Fostering Change's Teen Success Agreement (TSA) to help negotiate age-appropriate rules and responsibilities with youth in your care. This tool was created by foster youth. The TSA is a written agreement that outlines age-appropriate activities, responsibilities, and life skills for youth ages 13-21 in the child welfare system, and how caregivers and child welfare agencies will support those goals.

If you are an attorney for a child in a child welfare matter and want to help ensure they have access to age-appropriate rules and responsibilities: Use the Teen Success Agreement to guide your advocacy and shape the court orders you request. The Office of the Guardian ad Litem in Florida has created a Normalcy Practice Bulletin that provides advocates with concrete inquiries and activities to consider so they can ensure that youth have access to age-appropriate opportunities and experiences. 

If you are in favor of changing laws to give foster parents and caregivers more authority to allow youth in their care to engage in extracurricular and other activities: Ask lawmakers to enact a law like Florida's. The "Quality Parenting for Children in Foster Care Act" makes clear that every youth in care is "entitled to participate in age-appropriate extracurricular, enrichment, and social activities." It empowers foster parents and caregivers to provide permission based on the same standards that a "careful and sensible" parent would use, called "the prudent parent standard." Watch State Senator Detert, who sponsored the bill, explain its purpose and importance here.

Know before you say no: If you are a foster parent, child welfare professional, or an advocate for a child in foster care, know the rules for youth visiting with friends, getting a driver's license, and participating in extracurricular activities and sports. Too many adults involved with the child welfare system incorrectly assume that youth in care cannot participate in these activities, even when no law prohibits it. Know what your state prohibits and talk to other stakeholders about best practices to provide age-appropriate experiences. Several years ago, Florida initiated a campaign called "Know Before You Say 'No.'" All stakeholders should be committed to such a campaign.

Develop a Foster Youth Bill of Rights: Some states have enacted Foster Care Bills of Rights that include the right to participate in age-appropriate activities (see Pennsylvania's Bill of Rights here). States in the process of enacting such Bills of Rights should consider including court-enforceable provisions that provide youth with age-appropriate experiences and basic rights. Currently, foster youth in Oregon are advocating for such a law. Hear testimony before Oregon's legislature here.